Mridara's Poems

2011-06-30T10:56:00.000-07:00

AGE
-Mridara

the body

ages

like old

broken trees

the wetness

leaving

time changes

forgotten

the wood lays

groaning

with age

new dawns

brings spring all around

giving rise to

another young one

every minute

their leaves

glowing with youth

basking in the

glory of new suns

a weary ant

crawls

into another

decayed hole in the

old fallen wood

- 30 / 06 / 2011

2010-11-21T06:01:00.000-08:00

Happiness
-Mridara

danced in the dark
to a rhythm so divine.
peace eternal
ecstasies forever
to have wings
one with the music
mad passions towards endless joys
simple pleasures
To listen to my laughs echoing into the dark night
Happiness

- 21 / 11 / 2010

2010-11-05T14:11:00.000-07:00

Denouement
-Mridara

to feel freedom like never before
to breathe in the new colors of spring
joy unbounded
silence uncontained
denouement of rhythm
last sighs of the contented
mercy of the winds
that free the hatches of life
to create immortal souls
that take flight in the lightness of their eternity

- 7 / 11 / 2010

2010-11-05T13:57:00.000-07:00

Glimpses of eternity
-Mridara

The plight and mockery of existence.
The ripple of clouds in the night skies.
Lapping of singular waves of the seas
upon the limitless expanse.
Glimpses of eternity flowed forth to the meek .

- 6 / 11 / 2010

2010-11-05T13:34:00.000-07:00

Black...
-Mridara

The vast emptiness.
Like the black meaningless skies at night.
The silent lull of waves.
The rot of it all nauseating.
Foolish world. Foolish selves.
One lies on the bare sands
waiting to be swallowed into its deepest depths.
Away, away from all reminders.
Away, away from memory.
Away, away from existence.

- 5 / 11 / 2010

2010-08-20T10:41:00.000-07:00

To Die...
-Mridara

like a growing flame
insanity burns deep
gnawing at your breast
eating your stale heart
leaving you devoid
and you sit in lonely corners
plucking out the nerves on your wrists with bleeding fingers
trying hard to remove the dead rot that has become one with you
but you will die slowly
as the mold spreads deep into your nostrils
and your voice falls along with the songs that were never sung

- 20/ 8 / 2010

2010-07-07T08:21:00.000-07:00

A haiku...
-Mridara

the blinds pulled shut
not a window to peep
out into the void
that screams of life

- 07/ 6 / 2010

2009-01-30T23:21:00.000-08:00

LIFE UNRAVELS...
-Mridara

The pages of life turn to a silent wind
It having been a witness of every life
Forever present
Soothing the creases on your face
Lifting your spirit and twirling you into a soft dance
Bathing you with newness
And so my life unravels to the naked eye
Indeed, i was blessed to be a bliss.

- 1/ 2 / 2009

2009-01-30T23:03:00.000-08:00

THE ETERNAL....
-Mridara

As the blue of oceans merge with warm sands
So do all things blend into a dally of colors
Whispering stories of past bonds shared by souls
Deep greens of trees hugging ancient mountains
Petals caressing the wind as every spirit breathes in the sun

- 31/ 01 / 2009

2008-12-07T02:48:00.000-08:00

INTO FRAGMENTS...
-Mridara

Another end
Beginnings following ends in the wink of an eye.
Like a cycle of orgasms devoid of ecstasy.
Life,
Like the shifting grains in a sand clock
drains,
Never leaving a speck behind.
Searching for new beginnings again,
Nothing whole remains in the ruins of an end,
All beginnings seeming to abandon life's essence,
Taking doses of oblivion...

One day,
vanishing unknown into the skies.

- 1/ 12 / 2008

2008-02-08T01:40:00.000-08:00

A Rose
-Mridara

In a place far away
a place so secluded
a place man didn't know as yet
Here creation had been sustained in its original beauty
In this paradise
A rose came into being
A rose that was blessed with the blackness of space
A rose whose purity burned through whiteness
Never blooming in the light.
But in the misty dark,
She raised her head in majesty
To behold the world,
Unseen by anyone.
When the moon touched her velvette petals,
They blossomed,
Breathing in the blackness with sprays of moonlight
Even when dark clouds ate the moon,
The bloom still survived,
feeling,
seeing,
knowing
in the inky darkness,
hugging on to the humble night.

- 7 / 2 / 2008

2008-02-08T01:27:00.000-08:00

SPACES
-Mridara

Space, inhabits the mind.
Long spaces
Pulsing spaces
Lifeless spaces
Empty spaces
Eyes seeing in blurs
Ears dead to voices.
Allowing the cold winds to bite
Uncaring
Walking in dazes

In the end,
bluring out of life's living tapestery.
To be one with the spaces.

- 7 / 2 / 2007

2008-01-30T06:07:00.000-08:00

ART
-Mridara

who paints the divine strokes of the clouds
his art so real
his creations blessed with life
his art endless
from the lines on your hand
till your perfectly chiseled face
have you wondered at this
think
this world is a wonder
where every tiny speck is a masterpiece
look around you
and behold!

- 7 / 9 / 2007

2008-01-30T05:57:00.000-08:00

Dance Away
-Mridara

Alive as fireflies
Dancing in rapt melody
To the music of the night
Swirling among rain drops
Basking in the moon
Driven to frenzies
To no goal
Dance dance dance
Dance the night away till you drop dead.

- 12 / 8 / 2007

2007-07-10T10:00:00.001-07:00

On a Dark Night…
-Mridara

Candle shimmering
Flickering flames
Dancing shadows
Silence in the cubicle
Soft showers of rain outside
Splashes of water
Cleansing
The dark envelops nakedness
The flame playing on much naked bodies
Wisps of wet soil
Incense of mild heat
Breathing in the sultry air
Fire dancing in erotic ecstasies
Bursting into wild wildernesses
The water pours down sizzling in the heat
Rest
Completeness

- 9 / 7 / 2007

2007-05-21T08:50:00.000-07:00

As the images unwind…
-Mridara

Sitting by a window
looking out through its stained glass,
Watching life go by me,
All those eternal seconds
seems like,
one hazy dream.
Moving by,
as I remain,
unattached,
to it all.
After all,
Its nothing but images
On stained glass,
Running like a cinema,
oozing out of a projector.
Once the reel finishes,
everyone has to leave.

- 17 / 5 / 2007

2007-05-21T08:37:00.000-07:00

I KNOW…
-Mridara

Why a beginning?
Why a end?
leaving me nothing
Desolate I stand again
What can this mind do?
What can this body do?
Ha…
Showing me wonders
And pulling them all away
My sanity being vested on mirages
When will they shatter?
What would become of me?
Maybe if I begged time to
freeze me in my ecstasies
I might live on.
But no,
I’ll have to wait,
Wait for madness to descend
Wait for a miracle maybe
Wait for something.
What else can one do,
but to live on
in this sickness that has
plagued man from the beginning of time.

- 5 / 5 / 2007

2007-05-21T04:35:00.000-07:00

A White Moth
-Mridara

When I was born
God put a white moth into my hand
The white in a moth meant death
But it wasn’t so to me.
The whiteness bestowed upon my moth was the curse of morality.
I looked upon his whiteness like the quiet purity of the moon,
The purity of morality when first given to a being.

I tried hard to keep him beautifully white.
But his color always slipped.
Its flaky feathers were often ruffled by my rough hands.
When space tempted
He would try to escape.
White or black, all moths liked the night.

As days went by,
He no longer was his old self
His wings had turned into different shades of mud.
My hands were his prison,
Binding him like a specimen in a museum while he was still alive.
I couldn’t grant him freedom; it was against the laws of civilization.
The darkness in the cove of my hands wouldn’t suffice for him.
He longed to wander into eternal dark spaces.

As more days went by,
Crippled and suffocated
He laid down numb
And atlast,
Only after his energies were spent,
The meaning of existence dawned upon me.
I opened up the prisons.
In the moonlight.
He came alive
And flew into the dark of the night

What was morality anyway? Nothing but a meaningless delusion…

- 19 / 3 / 2007

2007-05-21T04:28:00.000-07:00

Eternal Existence
-Mridara

At the beginning of time.
When everything was created.
Made to exist for an eternity.
Changing shape and form as endless ages pass.
We were the greatest once.
But time moved.
Bringing with it erosion.
Like a vast sea eating away the shore.
Change was the bride of existence.
Together we moved with her.
Time grew faster and days grew shorter.
An erratic frenzy took hold.
Stripping earth from all her richness.
Raping her supreme goodness.
Then my existence changed.
I was chosen to enter life.
A sperm, an ovum, a fusion.
In her warm womb I was filled with the purest of innocence.
Her heart beat a lullaby that nursed me into the deepest of slumbers.
This was paradise like I had never felt before.
Suddenly my peaceful shelter turned into hell.
It moved in madness to spit me out.
I felt fear.
At last I was pushed out.
Crying in anguish.
A cold air enveloped me.
Rough hands brutalized my body.
They handed my shivering body to her.
Her arms were warmer than wombs.
Her bosom the softest.
Her sublime love binding me to her forever.
I had been scooped out of her very being.
This new essence of life was beautiful.
A divine existence.
Days pass and my life grows old.
My breath stops and I die.
But we still exist.
We shall evolve forever.
Eternity is endless so are we.

- 11 / 10 / 2006

2007-05-21T04:25:00.000-07:00

The Catch
-Mridara

Spinning a web.
Contemplating the fall.
Careful manipulation.
Intricate details filled in.
The perfect catch.
No place for flaw.
A sure catch.

Arid breath,
Bitter poisonous spit,
Hungry palates waited,
Sitting in its perfect sticky lure.
A brash silence.
Waiting.
Waiting.
A disturbing disquiet.
Commotion .
A prey.
The seduction complete.
Struggling.
Strangled by the viscid web.
Placidly she approaches like a messiah.
To put away the pain.
Keeping the circle of life alive.
Mouth drooling.
Moving swiftly…
Sniffing her prey’s scent.
Rushing…
Closing in…
Fangs sink in.
Relishing the first taste of blood.
Paralyzing her prey.
Its eyes watch with dread,
As she slowly devours the body.
The eyes are still, alive and watching.
She reaches the heart in her frenzy of greed.
Its eye closes.
She savors it slowly.
Completely dead at last.
The last of the heart had been devoured.

- 8 / 10 / 2006

2007-05-20T09:42:00.000-07:00

21st century CORRECTION CENTER
-Mridara

All alone in a stainless steel sterile lab.
Her body naked she crouched near the ice cold metal wall.
The white light blinding.
The disinfectant making her head swim.
Once in a while someone came in and looked at her curiously;
Mocking her nakedness and making important notes in their enormous books.
This must be an observatory.
These people must be the righteous ones.
They all wore clothes.
She looked around and saw other naked insects shivering along with her.
She must have been brought here to be dissected, physically and mentally, to rid the sickness of her.
They spoke soft morale words of silicon nectar.
Making her understand that she had to be secluded and catalogued because of her abnormality.
They injected ‘correctness’ with long raw needles every twenty minutes.
These were procedures that were required to make the world perfectly spotless and uniform.
These supreme creatures were privileged with metal hearts and they did only what they were programmed for.
They knew everything, they even ate at gods table.
These missionaries knew how to harness a free spirit,
Her crude originality made her more untame than many,
A maximum term of 6 months was needed to cure her.
Soon she would be clothed in rubber and anointed with a metal heart and a plastic moral soul.

- 15 / 9 / 2006

2007-05-20T09:00:00.000-07:00

Distorted
-Mridara

I seem different now, don’t I?
No one’s doll anymore.
I am tired of dancing to everyone’s music.
Adopting a hundred minds to please everyone.
How long do I will myself to be smothered.
Mr World I cant please you any longer, Farwell.

All alone at last.
My well deserved rest.
No one invades my space.
This new found solitude is sweeter than the sweetest.
An eternity of peace around me.
Freedom is mine.
Cant I live in this arrogant illusion forever?

Don’t take me away, please oh please leave me in this paradise forever.

- 1 / 9 / 2006

2007-05-20T07:58:00.000-07:00

Its I - A Nobody
-Mridara

Nothingness my virtue,
The wild my teacher,
Silence my music,
Darkness my shelter,
Death my master,
Emptiness the air I breathe,
The night my guardian,
Melancholy my speech,
Sadness my true comrade,
Destruction my garment,
Passion my heart,
I am the true daughter of existence.

- 31 / 8 / 2006

2007-05-20T07:54:00.000-07:00

Candied Confessions
-Mridara

I lost myself somewhere.
All I do is exist,
Ambitionless,
Willless,
Lifeless.
They all killed me and now they blame me for what I am,
I am nothing but their work of art,
Shaped intricately by their thorns and venom.
They killed me.
And now everyone’s gone.

I am so alone in my own gore.

- 27 / 8 / 2006

2007-05-20T07:49:00.000-07:00

A Killing Wrath
-Mridara

Not a soft voice, Not a soft heart.
Thousands of whips, Thousands of slashes.
The innocence lost.
Wickedness,vengence and madness remains.
Was there ever a beautiful movement to cherish? The injustice sustained in memory without blemish.
Oh God, when will I ever forgive them.
This repressed evil kills me.
None is justful, None is merciful.
Everything has been disfigured by scars.
Too mad to live.
Too scared to die.
Rotting forever in this pain.
Revenge and hate has devoured my heart.
Cruel destroying evil me.

Save them from me before I burn them all.

- 27 / 8 / 2006

2007-05-20T07:44:00.000-07:00

Genesis Of Nakedness
-Mridara

Life ends.
The world having been stripped of and thrown open for inspection.

A fools Elysium it was, full of absurdities.
Born with optimism we imbeciles plod towards wisps of hope.
Seemingly satisfied to wander a maze of insanity.
Disillusioned zombies.
Acting out unfeeling roles in the play of life.
No one knows where it all began.
No one knows where it all ends.
Could hell be any worse ?

- 25 / 8 / 2006

2007-05-20T07:39:00.000-07:00

A New Age
-Mridara

A million masks all around.
The unpleasantness sucking away the spark of many souls.
Them who were once as gentle as lambs have grown vicious tentacles.
Darn all this senseless cruelty.
I go to sleep in my cocoon.
This passing bane will ravage everything in sight.
After which everything will be born again.
A new pretentious innocence will dawn, making goodness and truth a fallacy.
Old states are beyond regeneration once the serpent ugliness raised its head in gods benign creations.

The world has evolved to greater heights.
Welcome to this brand new plastic paradise.

- 23 / 8 / 2006

2007-05-20T02:55:00.000-07:00

Bang Bang
-Mridara

I am dead.
Dead again in this dreary world.
Bang! Bang! Been shot by a friend who I held highest.
Bang! Bang! Been shot by a mother I loved dearly.
Bang! Bang! Been shot by a father I never knew.
I am dead again. Dead again.
Should have predicted all this happiness was just a sham.
The creator giving everything and pulling them all in a single blow.
Stripped and lonely, shivering to my very bone, no one to shelter me.
I died again.
Oh why, oh why all this pain.
Am I the worst of the worst sinners?
Maybe I was just terribly undeserving.
Driven back to my own empty space with whips.
I shall never venture out of my cursed domain.
Never did I belong.
Never was I welcomed.
They all shot me, they did, they all did.
Till the little life I had, drained away.

Good-bye my beautiful world, goodbye.
The darkness invites me, new dimensions I seek.
I am dead at last.
Fully dead.
Finally dead.

- 6 / 7 / 2006

2007-05-19T09:35:00.000-07:00

Inane Madness
-Mridara

I am walking….
The pavement seems like waves….
Interesting pattern….
Almost hypnotic….
So confusing….
Why this madness….
The sea seems tempting….
Why cant I belong to it….
Be a mermaid and live in the dark hidden depths…..
I still seek consolation…..
I still seek repose….
What can this disturbance be….
The repressed seems adamantly hidden….
Hope this curse doesn’t persist….
If so, destruction will follow and I shall be ruined for eternity….

- 29 / 6 / 2006

2007-05-18T07:33:00.000-07:00

Unseen Guardians
-Mridara

A power so supreme has chosen me.
Encompassing me with a profound love.
Forever promising never to orphan.
I search often for his abode,
But he seems all pervasive; uncontained by form or religion.
None brought me up,
It was only me and my unseen father.
He tamed me in my wildness.
Protecting me so tenderly.
Fulfilling even the most trivial of hearts cravings.
Mending and healing me slowly.
Blessing me with the best of things.
Teaching me with the best and the worst of experiences.
Like a father guiding my flattering feet.
Scaring me to obtain greater wisdom.
Elevating me to great spiritual levels.
Pouring unrestrained knowledge into me.
Humbling me with falls.
Making me the best perfect imperfection.
Building me into a mighty being.
I am being bred by the greatest of greats.
May I finish the purpose for which I was nurtured.

- 16 / 6 / 2006

2007-05-17T10:05:00.000-07:00

A NOBODY
-Mridara

You may never agree with me,
You may never comprehend a nobody like me,
After all who will stop to hear a nobody’s thought.

Quiet a perplexing line of thought to start a poesy,
Seemingly unchallenging to the intellect of man.

My bewildering incomprehensiveness is quiet comprehensive.
Who would care to hear a nobody’s thought ?
Care or not, I shall rave to the unseen.
Its quiet hard to suppress my train of thoughts .
The more I do, the more rigorous they are to burst out.

You might call me a rebel.
But I find immense pleasure in being the non-conformist I am.
Now let me have my say.

Things that fascinate most people holds not an ounce of ecstasy to me.
Yet things dry, dull and ordinary seem spell binding due to a simple beauty I witness in them.
Seasons winter and rain seems unappealing to most, yet to me their magic and mystery drives me to another level.
Those that are different from the masses seem to have substance and core often displaying profound gestures of deep understanding, wisdom and beauty.
Morning and night recurs everyday.
Mornings so bright, like a sterile clinic, makes me feel like an insect held out for observation and dissection.
But the humble nights are always abundant with their hiding places.
A haven I find in the bizarre darkness .
My imagination always a thousand times higher under her confines.
A perfect time to explore the unknown.

My nomadic thoughts come to an end here.
Would you still call me a nobody ?

- 3 / 4 / 2006

2007-05-17T10:02:00.000-07:00

A Nocturnal Muse
-Mridara

The moon, a boat plying illuminated crystals.
The sultry breeze blows softly, grudging to lift even the tiniest of withered leaves.
The stars seems like glowing white fire flies.
Jealous clouds creep over the happy twinkling stars stifling the light.
The moon too weak to bath the earth with her light;
Like a brazen bride she succumbs to darkness.
Black curtains of nightly fragrance conceals their wild passion.
They grow wild as their bodies entwine in deep ecstasy.
Springs of life forms awake to play their nightly instruments to match their rhythm.
Consumed entirely by desire they turn raw.
At last coming to rest in an encompassing sigh.

- 30/ 4 / 2006

2007-05-17T09:49:00.000-07:00

Immortal Silence
-Mridara

A touch of soft soothing melancholy.
The quiet seclusive sound of space stretches.
The whole realm in a deep hush.
Still as a tomb.
A brooding silence envelopes.
The wind whispers a myriad of secrets.
Many many mysteries to unravel.
A mortal body obstructs competence.
The quietness soaring to high levels of unearthly divinity.
A tranquility lulls the soul to peace
The darkness within muffled.
Wind had brought the long awaited tranquility.

- 30/ 3 / 2006

2007-05-15T08:29:00.000-07:00

My Last Will and Testament
-Mridara

My last will and testament.
A confession a decade old.
Dark secrets writhing towards the light.
It cant be.
Truths were always meant to die with the mortal body.
Never should their long preserved tender bodies be exposed to the grotesque light.
Light was never supreme to the all pervasive darkness.
Superiority was just a disguise to cover his weak self.
The dark contained terrible mysteries beyond the comprehension of light.
So why should darkness degrade its majesty by bowing before the light.
No.
It shall never happen.
My last will and testament shall die with me and we shall seek repose in the ever soothing darkness.

- 22 / 3 / 2006

2007-05-15T08:05:00.000-07:00

The Rarest of Treasures
-Mridara

Dedicated to Iris

An oyster found.
The beauty inside intriguing; a mystery.
Its shell pried open.
Inside a resplendent pearl resided,
Shining pure and white.
Immense beauty reflecting in all its facets.
Its flaws others criticize;
A foolish preoccupation indulged out of ignorance.

Body bruised by battling the sea.
With an incredible will to endure; to live on.
It emerged victorious with scars celebrating experiences and knowledge.
Forever a survivor, forever a precious gift with all its tarnishes .

How breathtakingly profound the pearl was, who can compare.

- 14 / 3 / 2006

2007-05-15T07:58:00.000-07:00

Everymans Women
-Mridara

A crude profession.
Her abode infested with pigs and drains.
The world spat on her.
Abused and molested everyday,
Sublime pleasures awaken no more,
Numb to most emotions,
At times an abnormal burst of the long suppressed emerges.
Her customers many,
From the pot bellied orthodox family man to the immensely respected takur.
Any man’s greatness scared her not.
She knew them all.
Their secrets, fantasies and frustration pour out to the one person who listens.

The sun had risen,
Time to pay and leave.
The agitated wife awaited at home,
A saree or an occasional jewel, and her heart would be soothed.

Her eye balls moved with the flapping curtains,
The sun dazzled her eyes.
The last man of the night had just left.
A nice bath and all would be washed away.
Would the takur come today ?
She liked him, he was kind to her.

Another long day and then the night again.

- 9 / 3 / 2006

2007-05-06T09:04:00.000-07:00

Intruders
-Mridara

Why would a lonely wanderer ever want a companion ?
A need for one never rose.
Life was never a puzzle to fit in.
Lonely and happy life was until a crowd barged into the soul .
A superficial level of existence always safe but emotions elevate relationships to higher latitudes where the frost bites hard disabling the heart.
A magnitude of peace could be sought in this beautiful world, and all without
companionship.
So why not dare the world that survival by one’s self is possible without a need to lapse out of this blissful loneliness.

-1 / 3 / 2006

2007-04-18T07:20:00.000-07:00

Snap Away
-Mridara

Break away.
Its madness to persist on.
Don’t you see the predicament you are in?
Trust was always a disguise to shatter.
Innocently the strings of your life have been handed over to the unknown.
A puppet you might become.
You swore after the last rampage that such a thing would never happen.
But here you are again treading the threshold of destruction.
Why submit yourself to such high states of vulnerability, don’t old wounds teach?
No more lamenting.
Its useless to regret at the 11th hour.
Hope lies in a last resort,
Obey before you are wounded and crippled forever after which a resurrection would be impossible.

Snap away from those bonds that bind man and make the sane rave in madness.

-1 / 3 / 2006

2007-04-18T07:14:00.000-07:00

Buried Alive
-Mridara

Days stretch long and dry…
The sun scorching the parched earth,
Dullness and monotony affects the mind,
Lifeless corpse like figures walk around in similarity.
Those close to hearts leave,
The distance an evil forbidding the old bond.
Those who live in hearts alone survive the test of time.
Stillness and languidity spreading like a plague.
Fear settles in,
Is this what we were deemed to do?
Repeat the repeated repetition forever,
When will we dare to be different and break free? or have we learnt to love this
wretchedness?
Barren and empty time seems like an eternal ocean….
How I wish I could trade this nothingness for something, anything….
Oh! Rain, come, come to save.

- 22 / 2 / 2006

2007-04-18T07:07:00.000-07:00

Blissful Recollections
-Mridara

Fog descends uninvited, slowly tenanting the wasteland with its majesty .
Dripping dew embedding common outgrowths with unrivaled beauty.
A sight floods my heart with awe.
A spectacle of a thousand webs entwined in shrubs, enthroned with intricate beads of silver.
The mild breeze caress me soothing the troubled creases on my face, singing the sweetest of lullabies .
Harsh sounds of life blanketed by the chill reaches the ear like a melody.
The whisperers gust forever cuddling tenderly.
The new scents of the day enticing senses.
The subdued silence fills me with a peace I hope to attain only in my grave.
Though undeserving, A movement of intense bliss I was gifted with.

- 6 / 2 / 2006

2007-04-18T07:02:00.000-07:00

A Rude Awakening
-Mridara

A multitude of footprints traced in the sand.
Beautiful shells strewn over the glistering sun baked beach.
Happy faces milling about.
Some remained silent and thoughtful contrasting amongst the illuminated faces.
Vendors desperate to sell pester.
The sea soft and soothing, welcoming with open arms, its horizons stretching.
The clear print of a dogs paw embedded in the wet sand I notice.
My mind floating in light bliss; I follow its prints, my eye fascinated by its clarity.
“ Look “, a shriek resounded.
There my dog lay shifting uneasily on the waves.
His body deformed and bloated,
Eye missing,
Froth from his mouth,
Flesh decaying.
Many a visitors frequented his watery grave.
His fellow companions stopped by him regularly debating a possible resurrection.
But he lay silent, unfeeling to the waves that beat his battered body.
Was he intoxicated by death or was he in pain; The decay disguising any expression.
His death a rude beauty awakening the senses.
Nothing mattered now; He had trodden into the next world, where peace he shall attain.

-2 / 2 / 2006

2007-04-18T06:59:00.000-07:00

A known nothingness called life
-Mridara

Life a dumb nothingness we are forced to live.
Sentiments and pretensions important lessons to master.

My life,

An act of copulation the reason for my creation. Somebody else could have had the opportunity to fuse leaving me happy in a state of non-existence. A destination of god I couldn’t have refused.
Childhood passed in a daze of happiness and abuse. Many a lessons I learnt, many a disappointments I faced, many a hopes were shattered.
Adolescence a complex stage, complicated further by unwanted negativity. Life I lead in a state of trance and frivolous seclusion.
My youth I trend with uncertainty. Many a ideas form, many a times I rebel, an enigma I appear to outsiders.
Soon I would marry the random man and multiply for a cause. My tender offspring’s I eagerly look forward to seeing.
The age of parenthood would pass in conflict and happiness. Many a things would be taught and characters we will help to form.
Old age will settle, leaving the mind stale and blank with many a wisdom and illness gained, anticipating death.
The end will dawn, Death will devour our worn out bodies with a gaping mouth or prolong an existence of agony and dependence.

I ask, Is this all life is about ? Yes, comes the empty answer, I always wondered, Why all the pomp about life for an existence that’s so simple and predictable .

The world a dolls house and we living puppets in the hands of god.
Fate, A supreme force that governs our movements .
Destiny, An agenda we play with no freedom of choice.
A more worthless existence than life could never threaten our spineless being.

-2 / 2/ 2006

2007-04-18T06:51:00.000-07:00

Transformation
-Mridara

You were born weak and vulnerable,
In size and stature you grew from the puny worm you were.
Your unwavering spirit feeding on essentials.
The continues labor tired you but still you pushed forward eagerly anticipating your transformation.
Instinctively you knew rest was needed and in secret a white cove you built.
Rest and peace was provided in seclusion.
Your confinement had changed your being.
It had changed you, no longer would your ugly self remain .
Your heart tells you its time to break free and show the world the beauty you had cultivated in silence.
Out you came in vibrant splendor astounding observers.
Your beauty incomparable,
Your grace unmatchable,
Proudly you conquer life.

-1 / 2 / 2006

2007-04-18T06:48:00.000-07:00

The Cycle of Fate
-Mridara

A traumatized childhood,
A love sick adolescence,
An arranged marriage,
A separation of infidelity left her alone,
Love still prevailed until death grasped him away,
Her baby with her she fought life.

A strange lump found,
Fear tormented her,
The result anxiously she expected,
Surely god wouldn’t punish her more than he already had? He would, it was cancer they told.
Shocked she fell to the floor,
Revived in minutes,
She walked home in a daze,
The last stage she trod,
Hope they didn’t waste on her,
Death at wake in a few months,
Her girl all alone in the world she would leave,
Guard her and pray she would from heaven,
But could she trust god?
He always rewarded her trust with a severe punishment,
Did he have untold wrath and ire against her?

The mahogany door before her, she taps.
A happy face peeps through the window and tiny feet rush to welcome,
She holds her baby close,
She would teach her girl to battle life, till fate calls.

-1 / 2 / 2006

2007-04-18T06:40:00.000-07:00

Delivarance
-Mridara

Blood everywhere
Flesh splattered
Brain a yard away
The reek of death not staying long
A fateful bridge
Corrosive petrol ignited in friction
A pyre not needed
Unable to save she watched
His death and cremation in minutes
The odor of charred flesh lingering
It was all over
God had saved him from an ordeal called life
She alone remained to battle it.

-1 / 2 / 2006

2007-04-18T06:18:00.000-07:00

My beautiful Adonai
-Mridara

I see my life before me; a huge void.
Why all the pains of birth to live something worthless, I wonder….
The worthlessness so tiring….
With countless hands pulling you down.
Cold hearts break warm hearts.
Cruel people choke life slowly,
Destroying the little life we posses;
Suffocation their hobby.
Once life sucked and corpse decay,
Leave you they do forever.
Nothing to worry my child;

My beautiful Adonai shall remain,
Adonai shall remain forever, never will he forsake.

-30 / 1 / 2006

2007-02-09T05:16:00.000-08:00

A White Face
-Mridara

yellow crumpled churidhar hung loose around her,
an ugly clown she resembled,
face oddly dabbed with powder,
the uneven whiteness like raw flesh exposed,highlighting her dark skin,
fidgeting in her purse a long time she did,
withdrawing a note she moved forward stick in hand,
Bang! She knocked on a stranger,
face red, he scowled and walked away, deaf to apologies,
realization dawned, I understood her peculiarity.

- 23 / 1 / 2006

2007-02-09T05:09:00.000-08:00

Redemption
-Mridara

Is it my twin I see sitting alone and detached, forgetful of the gay company that
surrounds her.
Books her favorite companion, abuse or forsake her they don’t;
Dreams a pastime she dwells on, easing the pain and disappointment within.
I wonder, was her dejection instilled when she was young and innocent or was it a recent phase caused by heartfelt sorrows.
A trance like numbness the reason for the aloofness in her eyes, I suspect, from my experiences of old days.
I who was once resurrected from the depth by the passing of ages and flesh that grew over old wounds, understand her, though she might not know.
How I crave to tell her that I know and care for her hurt?
Would she let me heal her or would time perform a miracle?

I owe her a resurrection, that much I know from past sufferings. No man would I let to trend the path I once trod, but god with all his wrath has created us in abundance, a curse we shall be until redemption we attain.

- 22 / 1 / 2006

2007-02-09T04:03:00.000-08:00

Pathos and Beauty
-Mridara

A madman I see everyday, rolling on the dirt pavement unmindful of dangers prevail.
I wonder about his delirious mind; did he have a past? does he have a present? would he ever see a future?
A conversation he held with himself about adventures had; the little girl who ran on seeing him, the old man who kicked him and on and on his list went until all the days events were discussed.
My observations he notes, his eyes piercing he returns back my stare, scared I move away, his interest distracted he hobbles mischievously towards another intruder, stone in hand.

Happy he seemed, sadness an aspect of life that didn’t make sense, A companion he had in himself, a pleasure sometimes barred to the dependent sane.

- 22 / 1/ 2006

2007-02-09T03:47:00.000-08:00

A Medley of Disparate Thoughts
-Mridara

It can be surprising how friends estimate their loyalties to be higher than the other; an interesting phenomena with no logical explanation known to so limited a brain.
A contradiction necessary, since misunderstanding prevails, my case presented and argued I shall return to normality.
My friend I hold precious to my heart, though she might not know, my shell exterior to be blamed I declare.
Her beauty and brains scare me not, since I place her not on a pedestal, I see her just as she is; a rare occurrence, an attribution to my sense of reality I gather.
Her negatives and positives hold a reason to my ever searching eyes. A negative might seem disadvantages in so perfect a creation, but I understand the reason and effect.
Many friends close to my heart I hold, but only in the most closest I connect inspite of the complexities she holds, not everything do I understand, Can dust and bones dwell in depth into the intricacies of the created?
I see several who admire or bewilder over the peculiar shines of a gem, but to me its the same old gem which needs a lot of protection in spite of its self exalting nature.
Her deliberate phases of madness were ignored and I stood in waiting for her old self to resume, a self I liked so much because of the solace and understanding they offered.
Was it a mistake of mine to have expected complete understanding after revealing half my self? Explanations I considered unnecessary crediting high mind powers.

What is said and done bears no significance, what matters is the diverse feelings of the heart which shall remain unchanged forever, if not in life; in memory, because of a connection we hold buried deep in our hearts.
Do you see my friend, this is reality, this is life, this what I am, this is what you are, this is what our friendship means; heartfelt, simple, unpretentious and real and that is all that matters in this puzzling world.

- 20 / 6 / 2006

2007-02-09T03:02:00.000-08:00

Strains of melancholic loneliness
-Mridara

When did I sink into this huge vacuum of loneliness? I who was so happy and gay in times past.
Why this heavy feeling of rejection prevails? I barely understand.
Why do I feel so empty and lifeless in this world full of bright colors and voices?
Why can’t I find the one companion I am desperately looking for?
Is it so difficult to find a soul to merge with? Would my life be spent without finding the one island I seek to surface on?
Was I punished when the creator made me different from the replica’s in this vain world?

My mind bursts without a soul to speak to, how long do I conceal my ideas within?
Am I afraid of being mocked? No, I just find the world outside undeserving.
Am I fed up with the world? No, I just wish I wasn't created so alien.
Alas! I have began to detest the void of my heart, with no choice I turn to the world .

But you Oh! Loneliness wouldn’t let me go, Have I become your favorite disciple? Why do you suffocate me with your shroud of silence? You shall find many others to consume and ensnare in your trap.
I once liked the seclusive tomb you offered, but now it stifles me.
My heart seeks to repeal you but you seem bound to me by an unsealed bond.
Why do you haunt the nothingness of my life and remind me of your peaceful embrace when I try to break free from your clasp.

Oh! Loneliness, let go of me, haven’t I suffered enough, I wish to mingle with the world outside wearing a golden mask of pretension.

- 16 / 1 / 2006